Bullying: From A Victim’s Perspective

Bullying is and will remain a difficult topic to discuss, even among educators and scholars. I am introducing this topic as a way to acknowledge the viewpoints of bullying from the bully’s, victim’s, teacher’s, and parent’s perspective, hoping to help those persons affected by bullying.

The start of school for many children brings fear, worry, and feelings of extreme discomfort. Many kids have experienced physical abuse and verbal insults from the “mean” kids or bullies at school. Many parents worry about the  students and wonder what they can do to help them endure or avoid another year of tears, confusion, abuse, and pain.

As someone who suffered from being bullied for many years, I would like to offer some advice for the victims of the abuse:  I understand your feelings of self-loathing, confusion, pain, and humiliation. For a majority of my time at school, I was verbally abused which caused me to be constantly conflicted with my emotions. I had been raised to do good and to see good in others, but it proved extremely difficult to do so to the people who seemed to hate me. Over the years I learned that the bullies hated themselves. If you are a victim of abuse, it will benefit you tremendously to tell a trusted adult. If you are afraid to tell someone, still do so because it will enable you to heal and not have to carry the burden of thinking you are the only victim. Joining local support groups for victims of abuse will also enable you to overcome your fears and make your new school year a successful one!

Speaking up and speaking out against bullying will give you an advantage over the “mean” kids because unlike them, you are talking about your problems and working to solve them!  Also, if possible, help your bully heal as well. Bullies are mean for a reason and if you work together to help them, you are one step closer to ending bullying for good! Be sure to check out www.pacerkidsagainstbullying.org/and end the abuse cycle. [ As well as http://dmh.mo.gov/docs/mentalillness/womenanger.pdf , a PDF discussing how women can deal with anger, and http://freespirit.com/, a website designed for helping kids and teens  deal with anger!]

 -Jada Winchester, CPPS Intern